Darling Daughter: You don't want to be fat

Dear 7-year-old-daughter, you are full of deliciousness. You have a kind heart. You have energy in spades. You have sporting #skillz gurfriend. You have a sense of humour. You have a healthy dose of I’m-prepared-to-challenge-the-boundaries attitude. You have the most exquisite blue eyes. You have a giggle that I want to bottle up and then release into the world to make everyone smile. You have a sense of self beyond your years.

Macy, put simply, I think the sun shines out of your gorgeous little bottom.

A few weeks ago my darling girl, out of the blue, you lifted your top, sucked in your tummy and said “Mum look how skinny I am!” You correctly interpreted my look of confusion panic heartbreak, and you clarified: “What?! I don’t want to be fat!”

Oh Macy, my magical little daughter, let me tell you want you don’t want to be.

My darling girl, you don’t be cruel and hurtful. You don’t want to be the arrogant person that people can’t speak fondly of. You want to be kind and well respected. You want people to feel they can depend on you, trust you and enjoy being in your company.

My gorgeous daughter, you don’t want to be a victim of domestic abuse. You don’t want someone to overpower you physically, emotionally or verbally until your spirit is exhausted. You want to be vigilant against people who are hurting you or causing you harm. You want to have the confidence, self-respect and strength of character to be able to walk away and create for yourself a life of love, health, happiness and positive growth.

Macy, you don’t want to be illiterate. You don’t want to hold a book or a pen in your hand and not understand what a gift it is. You don’t want to fear words. You want to be able to sit in an arm chair and escape to untouched destinations that are only accessible through literature. Books, newspapers, magazines and articles will forever provide with you the opportunity to explore people, places, circumstances and events. And writing, oh my girl, writing, you want to be able to write. You want an ability to express yourself in a way that you may not be able to verbally. Writing will give you a superpower like no other – you can fill out forms for a passport to travel the world, a bank account to save for all the things you want or a student loan to open the door to a lifetime of education and discovery, Creatively, writing will allow you to release the amazing thoughts that whizz through your mind. Being able to write gives you the opportunity, if you want it, to impact someone so much that you change the way they think, speak or react.  

What I told my daughter when she said she was worried about being fat.

Macy my magnificent creation, you don’t want to be void of empathy. You don’t want to lack the ability to see the world through someone else’s eyes. You don’t want to be unfeeling to the emotions that they might experience. You want to be able to understand and appreciate people in all of their various forms – their pain, their victories, their circumstances, their fears, their worries, their views, their heartache, their joy.

Macy, you don’t want to be afraid; don’t be afraid of the unknown. Don’t be afraid to fall and get back up, to fail and try again. Whatever you dream, my darling, you can become. Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go, don’t be afraid of what might happen – go, seek the adventure my girl, in all its glorious mistaking-making forms!   

My stunning little lady, there are many things in this world that you do not want to be. Ignore whatever advertisement, whatever movie, whatever person, whatever picture made you think that you do not want to be fat and put your undeniable energy where it counts; be a nice person, a good person, an adventurous person, a confident person, a person with heart.